FWB strips a woman of dignity
Every generation is convinced that they’re discovering America. And I’m convinced that that’s a result of lack of interest in history. A bright and well-read person realizes after all, that we did not invent sex with no strings attached, nor homosexualism, nor drugs, nor the least of all what is called by moralizers a fall of morals. The safety chute just had to give in in the end and release the excess of steam. It’s especially clearly visible after the May bank holiday weekend, that I for one, like to call a holiday of morons, barbecue and hangover. Something of a modern revelry.
FWB and FOMO
Nowadays we just love to attach brand new, overblown vocabulary to phenomena that have been known for hundreds of years. Today I’ll focus on what’s been named FWB and what the psychologists like to call FOMO.
The first one is nothing new but its scale is related directly to the latter, which in turn is derived straight from the complete overstimulation of the modern society and its lack of ability to defend itself against manipulation.
What does Wikipedia say about ‘no strings attached’ relationships?
‘No strings attached’ is a form of a relationship in which friendly towards each other partners maintain sexual contact, albeit without the classic, romantic commitment. In this case we may speak of a ‘hybrid’ relationship of sorts, which conjoins personal elements characteristic for a friendship and sexual aspects of a romantic affair within the relationship, but without a romantic relationship and a traditional social ‘label’.
And in reality....
Why doesn’t it work? Because actually, most men (against their declarations) subconsciously do seek a partner for a permanent relationship after all. And if they agree to FWB, it’s because their ‘sex friend’ apparently doesn’t fulfill his criteria for a permanent partner OR he doesn’t see it because of FOMO.
What is FOMO?
It’s a phenomenon that’s completely impossible for me to understand because I, when presented with a very good option, immediately cease to seek another one which can be easily observed by the way I shop.
But anyway, FOMO is the Fear Of Missing Out, the fear of being overlooked, a syndrome often noted in the users of social media who live in fear that something important will happen and they won’t be a part of it.
Note the fact that Wikipedia clearly states ‘without romantic commitment’. Not without obligations - the obligation is there, we oblige to fuck each other nice and good, as long as we have the time and energy and we oblige to be there for each other whenever one person might need it, as well as simply spend time together as friends.
My experience states that men are much more susceptible to romantic exaltation than women. Scientific research shows in turn, that they fall in love and become involved much sooner. In fact, it often completely clouds their vision and they get themselves into very problematic relationships.
Sex equally pleasurable for men and women? - Never!
Another assumption on which this concept is based comes from the notion that both sexes experience pleasure in the same way. It’s a widely known fact that this is not true. On a different note, I wonder if there’s been some research done on that.
A lot of men see themselves as incredible lovers and you should do absolutely everything it takes to be able to receive the honor of going to bed with him. Because of that, they see FWB as a kind of relationship in which he treats you as a free whore.
He comes, you fuck, he leaves. There’s no ‘friends’ to speak of, there are only benefits and only for him.
I don’t know what it’s like for the entirety of the female population but my female friends do agree that finding a man who is actually this good in bed is somewhat of an urban legend somewhere on the border of the statistical error. Women are much harder to please, not the least of all because of their anatomy.
The phenomenon called FWB is in that case an agreement that he uses during the time he waits for the one and only princess, the love of his life and his wife-to-be, and you’re there to provide sexual favors, in addition as community service.
And old-fashioned lover is better than FWB!
As always, I’ll be conservative and not at all fashionable. FWB? No, I prefer an old-fashioned lover. With a lover you can go see a movie. With a lover you can go on holidays. A lover won’t forget about your birthday. A lover will get you flowers. And so on. And most importantly, a lover will become a lover because he doesn’t suffer from FOMO and he chose you because without spending time with YOU in bed, he absolutely won’t do.
And you’re friends too, anyway. What separates you from a regular relationship is that fact that you’re not sharing an apartment, a mortgage and the rest of the grey everyday reality. But at the end of the day, it’s someone you can count on, and not only when it comes to giving you a proper orgasm. That’s the kind of a ‘no strings attached’ relationship that works for me and I don’t need any new lingo for it.
Ladies, have some sort of demands. Demand from yourselves as well as others and don’t let yourselves be fooled.
FWB and FOMO
Nowadays we just love to attach brand new, overblown vocabulary to phenomena that have been known for hundreds of years. Today I’ll focus on what’s been named FWB and what the psychologists like to call FOMO.
The first one is nothing new but its scale is related directly to the latter, which in turn is derived straight from the complete overstimulation of the modern society and its lack of ability to defend itself against manipulation.
What does Wikipedia say about ‘no strings attached’ relationships?
‘No strings attached’ is a form of a relationship in which friendly towards each other partners maintain sexual contact, albeit without the classic, romantic commitment. In this case we may speak of a ‘hybrid’ relationship of sorts, which conjoins personal elements characteristic for a friendship and sexual aspects of a romantic affair within the relationship, but without a romantic relationship and a traditional social ‘label’.
And in reality....
Why doesn’t it work? Because actually, most men (against their declarations) subconsciously do seek a partner for a permanent relationship after all. And if they agree to FWB, it’s because their ‘sex friend’ apparently doesn’t fulfill his criteria for a permanent partner OR he doesn’t see it because of FOMO.
What is FOMO?
It’s a phenomenon that’s completely impossible for me to understand because I, when presented with a very good option, immediately cease to seek another one which can be easily observed by the way I shop.
But anyway, FOMO is the Fear Of Missing Out, the fear of being overlooked, a syndrome often noted in the users of social media who live in fear that something important will happen and they won’t be a part of it.
Note the fact that Wikipedia clearly states ‘without romantic commitment’. Not without obligations - the obligation is there, we oblige to fuck each other nice and good, as long as we have the time and energy and we oblige to be there for each other whenever one person might need it, as well as simply spend time together as friends.
My experience states that men are much more susceptible to romantic exaltation than women. Scientific research shows in turn, that they fall in love and become involved much sooner. In fact, it often completely clouds their vision and they get themselves into very problematic relationships.
Sex equally pleasurable for men and women? - Never!
Another assumption on which this concept is based comes from the notion that both sexes experience pleasure in the same way. It’s a widely known fact that this is not true. On a different note, I wonder if there’s been some research done on that.
A lot of men see themselves as incredible lovers and you should do absolutely everything it takes to be able to receive the honor of going to bed with him. Because of that, they see FWB as a kind of relationship in which he treats you as a free whore.
He comes, you fuck, he leaves. There’s no ‘friends’ to speak of, there are only benefits and only for him.
I don’t know what it’s like for the entirety of the female population but my female friends do agree that finding a man who is actually this good in bed is somewhat of an urban legend somewhere on the border of the statistical error. Women are much harder to please, not the least of all because of their anatomy.
The phenomenon called FWB is in that case an agreement that he uses during the time he waits for the one and only princess, the love of his life and his wife-to-be, and you’re there to provide sexual favors, in addition as community service.
And old-fashioned lover is better than FWB!
As always, I’ll be conservative and not at all fashionable. FWB? No, I prefer an old-fashioned lover. With a lover you can go see a movie. With a lover you can go on holidays. A lover won’t forget about your birthday. A lover will get you flowers. And so on. And most importantly, a lover will become a lover because he doesn’t suffer from FOMO and he chose you because without spending time with YOU in bed, he absolutely won’t do.
And you’re friends too, anyway. What separates you from a regular relationship is that fact that you’re not sharing an apartment, a mortgage and the rest of the grey everyday reality. But at the end of the day, it’s someone you can count on, and not only when it comes to giving you a proper orgasm. That’s the kind of a ‘no strings attached’ relationship that works for me and I don’t need any new lingo for it.
Ladies, have some sort of demands. Demand from yourselves as well as others and don’t let yourselves be fooled.
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