My 10 ways to grasp moments – how I bring the ‘carpe diem’ rule to life.
After that, I did nothing else – I compulsively tried to make myself feel better after all the bad things I had to experience – on the same basis as when you buy a child ice cream when it’s smashed its knee open. I realised that fairly recently, which in turn enabled me to achieve balance, more or less.
First of all – I spend lots of money on learning new things that I enjoy, and books. Life has taught me that the only investment no one will ever be able to take away from me, is an investment in myself. Investing in skills is the most beneficial kind of an investment. And books have always brought me a lot of pleasure. If I feel that my mental capabilities are especially strong, I reach for historical books and guides (of course I mean expert literature, for example about wine, not those telling me ‘how to live’). When I feel like escaping reality, I’ll go for fantasy or crime novels. What can I say, I devour books like a starving lion in the savannah devours a zebra ☺
Secondly – cinema. As a matter of fact, cinema is the lowest of arts but at the same time it’s just so effective when it comes to escaping everyday problems! Besides, I just love the ritual of going to the cinema. I also have my own key of selecting moves which means I’m hardly ever disappointed. Good company only intensifies the feeling of pleasure, although I don’t always necessarily require it ☺
Thirdly, I do my best to get enough sleep. With my insomnia it’s not always easy but when it works, I sleep as much as I can. Besides the obvious fact that sleep is need for the body to regenerate, I have fairy tale dreams – vivid, colourful and full of interesting twists. What’s more, I almost never have nightmares. I love sleeping and the only thing that can force me to set the alarm for an early hour is a morning flight. Although then I usually don’t go to sleep at all and then catch up on all the lost dreaming when I reach my destination. Everyone in my nearest surroundings has learned that the most important rule that allows us to live in harmony is the rule called ‘don’t wake me’.
Fourthly – I love food that I can devour. But also the process of cooking and baking itself. For myself, and even better so, for someone else. Small amounts of absolutely delicious foods. Providing my body with ingredients of the best quality. Trying out restaurants. Visiting cafés and pastry shops. I love all of it! There are so many places everywhere that are worth visiting and new tastes just waiting to be found.
Fifthly – spoiling your body – massages, SPA, long baths.
I love massages but sometimes I’m just thirsty for another person’s touch. In my world, the touch of my beloved person is not possible but a massage is a good ersatz and my body can be deceived in way. Besides, it works wonders for my health. All the small, annoying ailments such as tight calves or back pain disappear.
A massage cannot be shorter than two hours. A bath doesn’t count if there’s no foam, essential oils, scrubs, sea salt and rose petals. And of course, good music.
A day without a bath is a lost day for me. I used to always live in places that had either 50-litre water heaters that didn’t allow me to take a bath in 300 litres of hot water, or a shower. Transforming a regular bath into a long and very pleasant ritual has been my dream that has finally come true.
Sixthly, I’m never in a hurry. Even if the world is crumbling down, I do my best to remain perfectly calm and I don’t let the city fever take the best of me. I can’t help the traffic, and I have no influence over delays caused by tardiness, flabbiness or incompetence of others. If I personally fuck something up, well – crying over spilt milk makes no sense whatsoever. In one word – hakuna matata! Perhaps because of this my cortisol levels are as high as in the case of hunter-gatherer societies. I know, because I’ve had it tested. Generally speaking, let the world go nuts without me. I definitely will have no part in this madhouse! I’ll stand on the sidelines and watch… And that’s it!
Seventhly – sports. It’s definitely the hardest of all ways, because when your wellbeing is drastically decreasing and you’re short of energy, sports are the last thing on your mind. But I know from my experience that you have to force yourself. To survive the first 10 minutes. Because when your body gets warm, all of a sudden all the physical effort becomes fun. I only wish I loved closer to a forest because out of all activities I most like a few hours of riding my bike in the wilderness. But then again, it’s not that far either, thankfully. I also love long walks, although in Warsaw they can mostly be practiced at night because for the most part of the year the condition of the air is not suitable for enthusiasts of walks. But if I’m away from the city, then exploring the neighbourhood is undoubtedly my number 1 objective. Walks are in a way my own kind of meditation. Hiking is the best way to think something through.
Eighthly – computer games. No skimping, all the full versions, the whole thing. I sometimes disappear for two weeks, completely escape reality and let me tell you, I don’t feel guilty at all about it. Every now and then everyone has to take a break from their life. And virtual reality is here to save the day.
Ninthly – writing. Because it’s best to channel all the accumulated emotions this way, even if it’s jut writing for yourself. It’s insanely inspirational to be able to go a year or two back in time and see what we used to think about then and what problems we were nagged by and… how little they mean in hindsight. For the stand-byers my writing sometimes sounds like complaining, but well… That’s what’s it’s all about, releasing all the difficult emotions and not poisoning yourself with them anymore, right? For some time now I’ve also treated Instagram and Facebook as more of a diary and a register of what has happened rather than social media.
And finally, point number 10, which is travelling. Travelling is like magic, like jumping into a different universe. It’s an incredible stimulation for the brain and at the same time a huge pleasure. Nothing boosts one’s mood just like travels do. If I’m honest, my usual reaction to the biggest problems is a compulsive getaway. It’s not easy when you have a small zoo at home and you’re scared of flying more than anything else. But of one thing I’m sure – it’s worth it. I have my list of places to see and sometimes I worry than I may not have enough time to tick off all the points. But you can always try, can’t you?
I really recommend to everyone to stop for a moment, be alone with yourself and think about the things that bring you the most pleasure. People have very little contact with themselves and are lost in the everyday hurry. They let themselves be influenced by social pressure, stereotype pressure, habit pressure. Which makes them run like hamsters in a wheel. Losing everything that matters along the way, including themselves. It’s easily observable before Christmas. You really don’t have to stand in that line of 40 people. Nothing bad will happen if you don’t fill up your trashcan with rotten food and don’t gain 3 kilograms. You really don’t have to spend this time with your family, if it’s stressful for you. You don’t have to be stuck in the traffic or sit on an overcrowded train just because someone said that you should. The world won’t collapse. It’s better to spend this time with yourself or with people that you really care about. You can go on and on about it. But we only have one life and one health. Good luck!
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